Is it true that because my life is boring, I don't write about it?

Pretty much.
Really though, I just feel that the events of my life don't merit enough interest to earn any kind of spot on my blog, and I find my personal thoughts to be much more interesting than what happens to me.

Fact is stranger than fiction, although this hardly occurs in my life.

Everybody Else

The Kneecapper is quite an interesting name for a shotgun, yet it speaks volumes of truth.

On a more important note, what is fiction? It is merely the telling of an untrue story. Yet, why would one by compelled to create lies with absolutely no benefit? Imagination is a dangerous thing, especially when wielded by those with considerable influence over the general public.

Take, for example, The Davinci Code, written by Dan Brown. A "Number One Bestseller!" proclaims it's cover, which is fitting, seeing as it capture the imagination of millions across the world hoping to find the Holy Grail. Even yours truly, this pinnacle of cynical thinking, had to remind myself several times that the events never occurred, and are more than likely to be untrue. Yet, this amazing work of fiction managed to worm its way through my mental defenses, and enter my thoughts as something close to the truth.

If, for example, someone suggested that the Holy Grail was actually a person, I would not be as quick to doubt them, whereas before reading the book, I would have laughed at their ignorance, so quick to be lead to believe in internet hoaxes.

So my fellow writers, beware this considerable influence you hold over young, developing minds everywhere.




Stephenie Meyer.

Claudia. Santi.

I don't have the foggiest idea what the second word means, but the first word refers to a, to say the very least, interesting girl at my school.

Recall that "interesting" is not synonymous for "bad".

Either way, this leaves me to ponder my recent lack of creativity. Sitting here, in my relatively uncomfortable sofa, the words do not appear to my fingers as they once did. Perhaps I have exhausted my entire reserve of ideas?

Am I one of those, who slowly harbor thoughts and ideas over a long period of time, and bury those deep into my subconscious, only to dig them up when the opportunity for a creative outlet appears?
Many type of people show this characteristic, such as old people, who lose some mental facilities after long periods of time, or the song writer for Linkin Park, who seems to have lost ceased all mental activity after finishing Meteora.

While I haven't lost any of my mental capactiy, and I certainly haven't became some sort of vegetable song writer leeching off the trust of my fans, but I certainly have seem to hit a mental block. Perhaps it just needs time.

Meh.

Tasting deliciusly of chocolate.

You can't possibly make a diagram of the human body. You can't map all the feeling that we feel, and what is it to be human other than all these feelings in our body? What is something as abstract as this be anything but a space beyond which There Be Dragons? In my body, we know There be Dragons Everywhere; they may not all have scales and forked tongues, but they Be Here all right, shouting and jostling and trying to grab my attention.

At last, perfection.

To live in a perfect world is a conundrum within itself. For nearly all people, with the exception of a few deranged individuals, a perfect world would be one without suffering. However, how can we enjoy perfection if we cannot suffer the imperfections? Would you enjoy a delicious cup of coffee as much if you have never had the most bitter? What would you compare the feeling of victory to if you have never experienced loss? How would you know at what standards to set?

Yes, we love, and we live. We hate, and we die.
If everything must end, then love must end at one point, and we will feel the pain of ending a relationship. But through a relationship, there is so much joy derived from the fact that you know one day, it must end. Subconsciously, you know that this is true. If you knew that you would always have a delicious food, would you not take the fact for granted? We already do, in that we have our emotions to help us through life. We know that we will always have them, and yet, they are hardly ever recognized for what they are.

If you knew that a relationship would last forever, it would be taken for granted, forgotten, and potentially ruined.
So please, I plead for all of you who read this to never grow bitter and hateful toward the past, for the ending of one thing has always been the product of joy from something else.

This time, with feeling.

There are great writers, and there are great speakers. I find myself in the latter group, with all efforts to remain modest. As ever, I've always had a knack for articulating my thoughts better through the use of a written language than orally. I often look back at myself in the past, and kick myself for being crude, pointless, or even flat out wrong when attempting to speak, but in words, I can rally the ideas into some sort of organizable rank and file, and march them through my finger tips and into the computer, as opposed to a forced, and very inefficient advance through speech.

So I must say this. Why did I do it? For many reasons. One of the simplest reason is that I didn't feel the same for her as I used to. Simply put, I lost the feel. This is an often enough occurrence between couples, and I find myself no exception to this saddening phenomena. However, several factors affected this, and I still feel that the entire blame for this situation falls on me, and me alone.

Then, there was the distance. On both sides of the relationship, we found ourselves drifting apart, causing her to be more insecure, and myself, hurt. I knew she was sad, due to conversations I would have with her, and conversations she would have with my friends. I knew she was sad, and I couldn't do much about it, other than rework my entire schedule, which is something I just can't commit to. Therefore, I knew she would have to live while being sad, insecure, and afraid of the moment when I would break up with her. This, inturn, made me feel extremely guilty, as well as sad. The weight that this bore upon me was enormous, and well, I might have panicked a little bit.

Granted, I still think I made the right choice, but I did it without thinking it all the way through first. If I had thought it through... well, the end result would have been the same, just much delayed.

There were other reasons, but explaining all the little ones would seem trivial to those who do not understand the mechanics of how I think.

To summarize how I felt for that entire week before, I present one song that summed up all my emotions.

Enjoy.